Wrecked.

If I said that coming back home has been easy I'd be lying. If I said I have been feeling totally wrecked, devastated, and undone I would be telling the truth. 

I miss Africa. I miss it more than I can find the words to explain. I never thought it was possible to fall so in love with a place and people in just 3 short weeks. I never thought it was possible until now.

I remember the searing pain that engulfed my heart the second I started saying my goodbyes. The hot tears that filled my tightly closed eyes as I embraced the babies that I had the privilege to care for and love with every fiber of my being while I was there. You can't just be with these babies everyday and then leave them without feeling totally helpless and a great sense of abandonment. There is no going back to who you were before you went, but there is a great fulfillment that comes when you choose a life of service and sacrifice; when you choose to step out into the darkness and find that fulfillment in hurting and unlikely places. When you walk inside the lives of broken people and you sit down in the red dirt with them, you too become broken. Your feet become tired and dirty and your heart becomes heavy. It's hard to accept that you will never be able to help all the millions of people living in ruins, but living a life in service helps us accept our purpose. It's important to live a life that is uncomfortable and not self-seeking. To live a life that is overflowing with love, and that is full of moments that break us apart, while in the meantime living a life that helps us understand why we're here. Even if we can't help millions, we can help one. We can help one that is just as worthy and precious in the eyes of our Savior.


I challenge you to live a wrecked life. One that is radically shaken up and rung out, but is also transformed by confronting the worlds most devastating realities. Because where there is life, there is hope. Always.

Sincerely, 
Kenna

Watch a video of my journey here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4B-uNnfs1-w

Love One.

All my life I thought I knew what the picture of God's love was suppose to look like. I was saved, I memorized Bible verses, I sang the songs, I was baptized, I have been told repeatedly how much He loves me, and of course, I have always felt His love in my heart. 

But everything has changed. My whole world has been flipped upside down, shaken up, rung out, and changed. Radically changed.

I don't think it really sunk in that I was actually, for real this time, going to Africa. It didn't sink in until I started descending those steps off of our Boeing 747, once we landed in Nairobi. The smell of the burning coals and trash, mixed with so many other odd and unfamiliar smells, sounds, scenes, and languages, made for a real good "sinking in" sort of moment.

The next morning after we arrived and after our over-night stay at a Mennonite guest house in Nairobi, we hopped on a matatu (african-style van) and headed for Kibwezi. 

Nairobi during the night didn't seem so bad, but during the day, the sun exposed the city to be a place of a good amount of wealth and a place of pure poverty. A city in ruins. With unfinished architecture and construction on every corner, trash covering the grounds, homeless mothers carrying their babies on the streets with well-dressed business men and women passing the beggars and the orphans by. 

We drove throughout the madness and the altogether foreign sights of Nairobi and traveled through smaller towns during our almost 5 hour drive. Once those hours passed, it was such a sweet relief to pull into Kibwezi, at last. 

After we got settled at our new guest-house-home, I'll never forget the first time we traveled by foot into the town. Us, "mzungus" (Swahili for white person) greeting these beautiful African people and children. For some of us it was the first time we had ever walked the streets of Africa, among these people. We were giving "sweets," and hugs, and big smiles. And my heart was overwhelmed with the realization that I was there, loving on the people I had been in love with for years, but had never even met.

The days flew by. Faster than I imagined, and faster than I wanted them to. Certain plans were completely changed, so we went and served wherever we felt led to. We spent days walking for miles on the back roads of Africa, with clothes and shoes in our backpacks. We walked back into small brick houses and huts and clothed the children with whatever we had. We spent other days at schools, interacting with school kids and singing songs about Jesus. Some days were spent at a special needs orphanage, or making hygiene kits for young girls, even playing soccer and volleyball with high school kids, other days were spent making baby kits and traveling to the hospital to make a special delivery for the new mothers and babies. 

There were hard days, and good days. Days where you couldn't find a lot of words to say, and days where there were never enough words to be shared, spoken, or talked about. 

This trip changed me. And the few weeks that came with this trip has humbled me in a way that not even I can explain. Everywhere I went, I could just feel the presence of God with you. You could clearly see the sweet love of Christ in everyone, and everything.   

You see, these kids are broken and dirty and hungry and a lot of them are alone. But as I sit here I realize that I am very much the same as them. When I sit before the Lord, I am broken and dirty. I am alone without Him and I hunger for more of Him everyday, but none of the filthiness matters. It's all washed away in my eyes and in the eyes of Jesus. None of the dirt or the colors of skin or even the language barrier matters. Because when they come running into my arms with smiles on their faces, and when they hold my hand as I wipe that same dirt from their little face, I catch another glimpse of Christ's love for us. 

Before I went to Africa I thought I knew everything about what it was like to love and be loved like how Jesus loves, but in reality I knew nothing. Love knows no boundaries. It's not confined. Love is not commercialized and love is not about materialism. It's about time. It's about investing time and being a servant to other peoples needs. It's not always comfortable, but the biggest thing is humbling ourselves to recognize the need for relationships. Our greatest fault is our casual blindness to the despair of others.

Love and life is about being interested in other peoples hearts just as Jesus has always been interested in yours. 

                                                       

Africa will always remain a part of me. It will never leave my heart or my mind. Its red dirt will always remain stained in the creases of my backpack, and on the bottoms of my feet. It will never fade away. Because a love this deep has no chance of ever being forgotten. I've learned that Africa is love. I've learned that wherever you go, go with your whole heart. Even if the people you meet along the way and the place where you stay steal it away. 

Sincerely,
Kenna

Sketch Book entry:

Africa: Day Seven 

(June 3rd) 5:58pm

Everybody tells me that I'm helping change the hearts of these kids, but really, they're changing mine. 

Anxious Heart

I leave for Africa tomorrow afternoon. I am at a loss for words.
I am so thankful for all the incredible support that I've had from family, friends, and my church throughout this journey. It's so humbling. There are so many different emotions at this point, tonight, as I'm hugging my parents, receiving phone calls from family members and best friends, and as I'm sitting here in awe of how The Lord has brought me to this moment. Through the years of not knowing how or when I would get to Africa, The Lord knew. And here I am.


"My mission belongs to the Lord. With all my heart I give my energy and my time to the Master because I love Him. Therefore, I'm going to look at every day not as mine, but as His. And I will treat each minute of His time with respect and focus and the dedication that it deserves." -Elder M Russell Ballard



Sincerely,
Kenna

I Promise to Share You.

Dear Sketch Book, 

In less than two weeks, I will start to fill up your pages. We will travel 9,000 miles across the world together and I will keep you tucked in my backpack, at all times. I promise to share my stories with you. I will let sweet little babies draw on your pages, if that’s okay. I will fill you with names, and prayers, and love. I will write to you about Jesus and all that He’s doing. I will take pictures of the places I leave my heart and of the people that steal it, and I’ll patch those pictures inside. I’ll let dirty handprints remain and I’ll probably cry a few tears that will drip onto your pages. And once we return home, I promise to share you.

Sneak Peek.

I love my church.

Timberline Church has been stellar through this whole process leading up to my trip. Not just by generous financial support, but also by covering me in fervent prayers beyond what I expected.

On May 26th, two days before I leave for Kenya, the church offered to share my story by asking questions about my trip, for example: what led me to this point, where will I be going, and what exactly will I be doing, etc. They will be cross-promoting the article on both Twitter and Facebook.
It is an amazing opportunity to formally introduce myself to the Timberline Church family and to the supportive people that have been following my journey.

So, mark your calendars, people. May 26th. Check out the lovereaches.org website for more info and follow Timberline Church Missions on Facebook and Twitter.

Here's a sneak peek:

What prompted you to make this step at this stage in your life?
- Honestly, I've had a number of people ask me this question. They can't seem to grasp how an eighteen year old girl has her heart in a country that she's never been to.
Ever since I was a little girl, I knew that I had a passion for helping people and a growing desire to do missions. I remember one Sunday morning, about seven years ago, we were attending a church in Branson, MO, and a huge group of African children came from Uganda to share their culture and talk about how Jesus was changing lives. Africa never left my heart since.
A few years passed, and in 2010 I had the opportunity to go on my first mission trip to work on an Indian reservation in Sisseton, South Dakota. Due to my family struggling financially at the time and the limited amount of time to fundraise, I began to lose hope for my chances of going. That was until a couple days before the deadline, a family friend showed up at my door and presented me with a check to cover all of the costs.
Jesus just kept showing up, as He always does. A few more years passed while I continually prayed about Africa. I knew that it would be a huge step if the opportunity ever came up, but I also knew that God was tugging on my heart more and more each day for me to take action.
The end of last summer, an old friend of mine introduced and had me contact her friend Riley Banks. Riley's heart has been in Africa since she was thirteen. Once I started talking with Riley, I found out that she had just opened up a school in Kenya the beginning of that summer. She talked to me about her non-profit organization "Generation Next" and how they are continually providing hygiene kits for girls, and backpacks/school supplies for the children in Kibwezi. She also told me to let her know if I ever felt led to go to Africa, because they were planning their next trip for May 2014. When I received that information, I literally sank to the floor and wept. I was so overwhelmed with the fact that I just received a huge confirmation from God. 

The Countdown Begins.

Fifteen days.

Visit my new Facebook page at: https://www.facebook.com/kennasjourneytokenya

Hey. It's May.

I woke up this morning and it hit me. It's May. I've been so bubbly with laughter and tears so far today. Why, you might be asking? Well, I'm leaving for Africa this month. How incredible is that? The Lord, I know, has spent the last 18 years preparing my heart for this specific, life-changing event. Even though I'm not sure if I really feel totally prepared. I think we all feel that way in life most of the time. The great thing is? Jesus is all-knowing and all-powerful. And the strength that comes from putting your trust in Him, compares to nothing else.

During some intense brainstorming, I was praying about a certain way I could share my story and bring parts of my journey back home with me. I knew almost immediatlely the answer to that.
Ever since I was younger I've kept a journal. But most of them weren't like the average young girls "diary," I've always written down dreams, goals, plans; I've drawn pictures, and put a lot of prayers in writing. My family always says that I've basically had my life planned out since the age of six. But I sooner realized that life never goes as planned, and that's okay.

Back to my brainstorming idea: a sketch book. But not just any sketch book. A compilation of pictures, words, names, places, handprints, drawings, prayers, and daily events.

 A journal. A journal of Africa. 

#withlovefromafrica